What is sexy? This philosophical debate has been going on for eons. Probably ever since Eve was unsure of how to arrange her fig leaves. The term is as elusive as trying to define what SPAM is. I think deep down we all want to be sexy— there is a certain power in it.
Unfortunately, sexy sometimes gets a bad rap. We can tend to think that being sexy means something dirty or promiscuous. I would disagree with this line of thought. Sexy is an attitude, an awareness of one’s self. To dress sexily doesn’t necessarily mean that we need to embrace corsets or badly-dyed animal prints. The new definition of sexy can be someone who is completely covered, or even (though I will always hate these) a shirt with a crew neck.
In middle school—that wonderful time when I realized that world revolved around me—I loved tight pants. I thought the tighter they were, the better, and the same with shirts. I couldn’t help but notice how my sister had acquired a great set of curves, and I had not. My own were late, and I think I wanted to highlight whatever I could. Unfortunately, this thinking carried with me for a long time until I tried on a shirt that wasn’t slicked to my body and I realized that it actually made me look thinner.
I’ve said this many times before, but I don’t care; I’ll say it again: fit is so important; but good fit doesn’t necessarily mean extremely form-fitting. The most warped sense of sexy is a person who wears things that are unflatteringly tight and revealing, which screams, “I’m desperate, unaware and have no self confidence.”
Grace is sexy. Boldness is sexy. A fit that flows over the body is sexy. Your wrists and collarbones and the outline of your waist is sexy. A flowy blouse that blows around your body can be 10 times sexier than one that is tight. I used to think that long skirts had no place in modern society, but then I saw one that draped lovingly around the woman’s legs and gave her a romantic, ethereal look. It was sexy.
This also means that adding a little spice to your wardrobe is great. A good V-neck isn’t going to make you look like a whore, and showing off a little leg or your curves won’t make you lose your self-respect. Our bodies our beautiful things, and treating your body well doesn’t mean being so ashamed that you cover it all up.
If you want to see an example of someone who I feels redefines “sexy,” look up Janelle Monae. Amazing singer and fashion extraordinaire, Monae wears men’s tuxes and riding outfits; and she does it with flair. I don’t think I have ever even seen her legs, but her sexiness blows me away. It might also be the fact that I have an affinity for riding hats, but if you look it up you can judge for yourself.
I love the fact that being sexy can be manifested in how you dress, and the truest definition of sexy has nothing to do with being sex-full. We can all look in the mirror and redefine daily what being sexy means for us personally. Until then, if you get tempted to buy something that looks like it belongs in a Seigfried and Roy act, just say “no.”