The recent advancements in technology as well as increased time devoted to social media has brought a new word into our modern vocabulary: parasocial relationships. This word describes the dynamic between fans and celebrities where the masses know an uncomfortable amount of detail about a celebrity’s life, but the knowledge and familiarity is not reciprocated, since the celebrity does not know each of the fans. Take for example, the buzz about Tom Holland and Zendaya’s recent engagement. The couple had dated for several years and decided to get engaged over the holidays. They will likely have a beautiful wedding and move on with their lives. Though the wedding will be the marriage of the two actors, there will be millions of people watching and analyzing the occasion. This is the nature of parasocial relationships: the blurry boundary between public and private, and information versus intimacy.
The interesting part of the story is that the internet discovered and deduced their engagement before it was ever officially announced by the couple. The manner in which the general public found out is worth mentioning. Fans with an attention to detail noticed that Zendaya was wearing a ring that came from a different designer than her typical brand sponsor, Bulgari. Fans even went as far as zooming in on a tattoo on her skin that resembles a “T,” even in its miniscule form. For hardcore fans, this was a full course meal of pixelated breadcrumbs for them to consume. Furthermore, some internet sleuths did some digging and found that Zendaya “liked” a few posts of engagement rings in similar styles on Instagram, which may have inspired Holland’s decision. This deduction has turned a sweet moment between two people in love into a spectacle for mass entertainment.
What explains this behavior? One reason why the couple might attract attention is because many members of Generation Z grew up dancing along with Zendaya in her Disney channel show “Shake it Up,” watching her acrobatic skills in “The Greatest Showman” and experiencing adolescence with her teenage characters in “Euphoria” and in Marvel’s “Spiderman” franchise. Holland also is almost equally recognized for his role of Peter Parker in Marvel’s “Spiderman: Homecoming” trilogy, and for less lucrative but perhaps as well-known media encounters such as his “Umbrella” lip-sync battle. The couple’s collective digital footprint is as extensive as it is entertaining, and since fans can feel as if they grew up with the couple, they now feel owed a window into the couple’s lives.
Another factor is that these are two talented, kind and conventionally attractive people who have a wholesome love story. Their endearing partnership is a breath of fresh air in our fraught social and romantic landscape. While other celebrity couples are dealing with breakups, affairs and scandal, the two lovebirds are like a fairytale off the pages. Furthermore, the couple are often described as “unproblematic,” which may be use as justification by those who obsessively follow their relationship
It is clear to see the toll this takes on the couple. “Our relationship is something that we are incredibly protective of and we want to keep as sacred as possible,” Holland said in an interview, “We don’t think that we owe it to anyone, it’s our thing, and it has nothing to do with our careers.” Of course, social media has not respected their wishes in the slightest. Everything from the ring, parents’ reactions and new gym memberships (yes, a recent article explained in full detail their new subscription to a celebrity athletic center) are public domain for scrutiny, theories and inquiry. This parasocial relationship may be unsustainable and could have consequences for the fans, the couple and healthy boundaries with social media.
