Being a baseball fan is even more fun when you’re cheering for these things…
#8: Barry Bonds’ Trial: Not exactly something to cheer for, but to those people who call baseball boring, I dare you to tell me headlines like “Bonds’ Ex-Girlfriend Says His Testicles Shrank At The End of Their Relationship” aren’t entertaining.
#7: Prince Fielder: Milwaukee’s, um, hefty first baseman completes one of his home run trots in under 2 minutes without the aid of a defibrillator.
#6: The Decision 2012: Albert Pujols has a one hour TV show in the offseason, the proceeds of which go to charity, in which he informs a stunned American populace that he will be taking his talents to South Beach to play for the Marlins.
#5: Home Run Derby: Blake Griffin participates.
#4: The Royals: Since their acclaimed farm system is not yet ready and an effort to boost slumping ticket sales, Kansas City signs Chad Ochocinco as a DH. A nice gesture which helps him get over his failure in Major League Soccer.
#3: The Twins: Minnesota makes the playoffs and yet again is bounced by a team who pays its players real money
#2: The Yankees: Spontaneous combustion.
#1 (and this one is for real): Ron Santo’s Paradise: The iconic Cubs homer/announcer passed away in the offseason. My only real hope for this season is that Heaven has a flatscreen TV and the Cubs win the World Series. So long Ronnie. Thanks for all the memories.